MINDSET. The way you see things depends on how you perceive them. Be present and observe people. Those who can see the good in every situation are happier than those who focus on the bad stuff. Even when a situation seems terrible, people who believe there are ways to grow from a bad event aren't locked to the past, but working towards better things in the future.
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Every day, take notes on the thoughts that go through your mind. This mindful practice can help you push away your negative, distortive thoughts about your past and future. With a clearer mind, you can fill it up with the things that you are grateful for and strategies that you can can execute on to move forward in your personal life and career. If you have a smart phone with you, this is very doable. Use a note-taking app and write your thoughts down. Personally, I really like using Google Keep. If you don't have a smart phone, carry a little notepad and pen with you so you can write your thoughts down. At the end of the day, review your...
Cognitive Distortions 10 - Don't assume responsibility for something you're not responsible for. For example, you have a friend who is abusive towards his girlfriend, so you have a talk with him on ways to resolve an issue without resorting to violence. After a number of heart-to-heart talks, your friend hits his girlfriend again. This crushes you, and you tell yourself, "I must be a bad friend." No, you did the best you could to reach out to your friend to change his behavior, but he didn't. What your friend ultimately does, is his responsibility, not yours. Maybe you're helping your little cousin to do her homework. However, she still doesn't complete her homework. Don't put blame on yourself. You...
Cognitive Distortions - Part 8Don't scold yourself or others for falling short of your standards. Do you find yourself telling yourself, "I should've done this" or "I should've done that"? These type of words and the tone of them can create unnecessary frustration in your life. When you have goals, it's human to fall short at times. No one achieves everything they want. Take a closer look at your journey and all the knowledge, skills, and relationships you've gained. Don't you think all of them are wins? They are! Now, the same goes for how you judge others. Don't scold them for falling short of your standards. I repeat "your standards," which could be blown out of proportion (another cognitive...
Cognitive Distortions - Part 6 Don't blow things up out of proportion or minimize them. When you fail, don't exaggerate your errors and imperfections. Don't blow them up way out of proportion because doing so will cause you unnecessary grief. Everyone makes mistakes. Failure plays a huge role in your learning process; however, you may fear it as you get older. Constantly remind yourself that failure is part of your growth. If you fall down, you can get back up again stronger by learning from your mistakes. When you tried to walk as baby, you would fall down often, sometimes getting injured; yet, you kept getting up and trying again until walking became second nature. Products, services, and philosophical and scientific...
